I think I lack it.

Sometimes I think about what would happen if I just fall too deep into the hole, unable to get out, doomed forever? Well, I guess at least I’m aware of it. But, it’s just so hard to stop thinking about it all. I feel like it’s haunting me every second of every day.

I try to convince myself that that it’s good and I’m well but maybe I just need another pair of eyes to see what’s really going on. I’m no longer a child but is this what I have to worry about for the rest of my life?

Society expectations and societal standards are truly insane. But I can’t help but conform.

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I just need more self-love and care to stop this crazy mentality. Baby steps. To less care for others and more love for myself.